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And years later I finally return to my spiritual journey! Since my last post I have tried to go to various churches to reconnect with my Christian roots. Didn't work. Either just didn't quite fit, was stale or purely creepy. So I have taken my time over the last couple of years. Experimenting with praying to a God or Godess. I opened up to spiritual work in receiving energy work such as Shamanic journeying, Cranial Sacrial or Reiki. That was helpful too. But I honestly cannot see one without the other (Christian/ "New Age"). Not to mention I have been SO judgemental about the whole thing that I have had trouble opening up. Until finally I began to focus less on the opinions of others and more of my spiritual self and my feeling of Oneness with Good/Godess/Creator/the universe/higher self or whatever you want to call it. I realized that religion is a tricky thing because it once again places us in a victim role. Unable to control circumstances. I decided that I can "heal myself". So I continue with the energy work, praying if it feels right, but I took control and put myself into action. I started meditating on a regular basis while intertwining Buddhist, Christian, and Wicca beliefs. I took what is called a Reiki level 1 course. I began to spend more time in nature. But most of all when I caught myself getting caught up in that which is the crappy bullshit feelings of society, I looked inward rather than outward. I stopped trying to do mind reading scripts of those in my life. I stopped focusing on what others thought. I stopped seeking external ways to fix my situation... I stopped focusing on dating, on a God to fix things... and I focused on what felt true to me instinctively... but with connection to the greater universe. It has led me in such an interesting direction so far. One that I am quite surprised by! Between dreaming of 4 leaf clovers and reading Jeff Brown's book the Uncommon Bond led me on a journey to find a healing retreat. Everything linked up to Ireland. So I have started the process of looking into work abroad!!!!!!!!!!!!! when people ask why Ireland,, I have trouble explaining the true path that led me to that revelation. However there is something pulling me that way for sure!